Position - Orange boy.

Junior club - Uri Geller's Spoonbending X111

Debut F7s season - 1873.

Favourite Rugby League team - Wests Tigers when they win.

Hobbies - Pulling wings off flies and playing Chess against inanimate objects.

Fave Food - Human Flesh.

Fave movie - Cannibal The Musical.

Fave song - Surfer Doll - Sir Robert Helpmann.

Fave book - Anything by Sir Arthur Curmudgeon Smythe.

How I got into the F7s - Roosterboy threatened to beat me up if I didn't join the Lions.

What I'd be doing if I wasn't a F7s player - I'd be God's senior advisor.

Anything else? - Lists piss me off.